Tom Hiddleston is here
by jennygoesrawr
Summary: Tom Hiddleston/Self Harm/You...can be triggering..


Your whole body felt numb and it was difficult to shift. The lump in the back of your throat became more difficult to bare and the fact that your parents constantly picked out bad thing about you pushed you further and further off the edge, they made you feel worthless. Outside you could hear the heavy pounding of rain against the floor and the cold air floated into the room from your barely opened window and kissed your cheek. Sitting on your bed with your knees to your chest, the numbness became overwhelming and the only way to satisfy the numbness was to cut.

...

You know that you had cut too deep this time but you bandaged your arm as you sat on the floor of the bathroom. Your arm was burning and it did not fulfill the satisfaction you needed and the numbness had returned. You wanted to feel something other than numbness but the gash in your arm made you feel pain for a mere second and there you are, feeling numb again. You decide to go for a walk, to clear your head of all the demons. Putting your jacket on you felt a painful burning sensation in your arm but you didn't care and carried on.

...

You had gotten to a nearby pond and sat on a metal bench. The passerbys walking their dogs did not notice you. You blankly stared at circular patters on the grey pond as the rain fell, the numbness becoming almost unbearable. The lump in your throat became more and more painful and finally you began to cry. Looking down at the floor, your hair covered your face and your shoulders moving as you began to sob, without making a noise. Old women walked past you, old men did too. Sometimes even the odd teenager wouldn't notice you as you cried.

Some time went by and a man walked past but he was different. He stopped and turned to look at you, noticing your pain and anger.

''Hey...'' a soft voice said as he sat next to you.

You looked up in embarrassment, you hoped no one would notice.

You looked up to see a tall, slim man, who wore a suit. He held his umbrella over you, not that it made much difference. Then you realised who this blue eyed man was. His cheekbones were dominant and his brown curly hair was dripping wet. He was the man who had helped you through everything, the man who were on the posters on your wall, the man on your phone's lockscreen. It was him. Tom Hiddleston was sat next to you in the rain on a soaking wet bench, Tom Hiddleston noticed you.

He looked into your red puffy up eyes and he put his warm hand on your cheek.

''Whats wrong, darling?'' he asked in an almost whispered tone of voice.

''I...'' you were lost for words.

He stood up and held a hand towards you. You took his hand in yours and he walked you to his home. Opening the door, your favourite breed of dog runs towards you and licks your hand as you stroke him. His house smelt sweet and had creme carpet in the hallway. He led you into his living room.

''Take that wet jacket off'' he said as he produced a blanket from behind his leather sofa.

You did as you were told but you forgot that you had cut and the blood had soaked through your jacket. He seen. His eyes welled up and he stared as you tried to cover it up.

''Did you do this?'' he asked as he walked towards you. You began to cry as you tried to walk out but he grabbed your hand and stopped you. As he grabbed your hand, you jerked back and he caught you in his chest letting you cry in his arms. He wrapped his arms around you and you felt safe. He took you into the kitchen sitting you at the table as he produced cotton wool and softly began to wipe the blood away from your arm, it hurt but you didn't notice. It wasn't too deep so it did not need stitches. Tom put a clean bandage over your arm and handled you so delicately.

''I don't know why you did this'' he said softly as he held your hand.

''But you need to know that there are people out there who can help you, whether it be your parents, friends or even me.''

A tear parted from his eye as he looked down and bit his lip. He lifted a sleeve to reveal a pink scar across his wrist. He used to do it? You thought.

''People feel pain inside and think they can help it by inflicting pain on the outside, but it doesn't work like that. I wish I didn't start, but at your age I stopped and I'm still here.'' He lifted your hand to his chest.

''Can you feel that?'' he asked regarding his heartbeat.

You nodded.

''My heart is beating for a reason and so is yours.''

He put his hand on your face and softly pecked your lips with his. When he had finished, he lifted your arm and kissed the bandage.

''Please stop.''

He wrapped a warm blanket around you and sat you on the sofa and his dog joined you and he lay on your lap. Without saying a word he went into the kitchen to make tea. (How British!)

''Sugar?'' he said as he popped his head around the corner.

That night, you spent it with him watching funny cat videos on his phone and talking about your problems. You cried and laughed and knowing that he was there made the numbness fade and you were able to feel again. You felt happy and most of all you felt safe.

**Many people refuse to talk about their feelings with loved ones and if you do, please find help. If you find comfort in fictional characters, actors, TV shows, films or books then please look to them for help if you are ever feeling numb or suicidal. When you're upset, read the book, watch the film or just do something other than inflict harm upon yourself. Know that things get better, know that people are there for you. Tom Hiddleston has helped me through alot and if he helps you, I hope you find peace in this story. I'm also open to any suggestions on other stories like this. I'll be writing one of Benedict Cumberbatch soon so stay tuned. Stay strong darlings. xo**


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